[01] the slayer has landed

[vampirelayer]

After dealing with an army of last-bagel-gobbling bathroom-hogging three-am-giggle-fest Slayerettes in training for months on end?  I'm pretty sure dealing with reforming one hardened criminal will feel like something of a vacation.  I mean hey, there's no looming Apocalypse, no nightly vigils at fresh grave sites (one of the many advantages of boats - that whole lack of cemeteries thing), and no one lifting my hairspray every time I turn around.

Sounds like cake.  

Or at least like one of those little Hostess cupcake things you can get out of vending machines, which aren't as good as real cake, but they're still tasty if you don't think too hard about that whole nutritional value thing. 


Oh, I should probably introduce myself.  Buffy Summers.  Slayer.  Long resume of world saving, and new resident warden.  




But no really, are there any vending machines on this boat?

Comments

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

No vending machines and the food's rationed.

One of the many things that suck about this place.

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

You have a list?

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

Not exactly.

You'll figure it all out eventually.

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

You could always give me some friendly pointers. You know: don't drink the water, stay at least ten feet away from Smelly Harry, there's a tentacle monster in cabin 5C... That kinda thing.

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

Alright. Pointers.

A lot of the people here talk out of their ass, and by out of their ass I mean that they can be friends with you one minute and your worst friggin' enemy he next. That's mainly for inmates but the wardens I trust are Sexby, Howie, Una, Wichita and Kirk.

You can't go wrong with those guys having your back.

As far as ten foot rules. I've heard that Davros and the Master are pretty nasty- they don't really bother me but I guess they've caused a lot of trouble while they've been here?

I'm not really the person to go to for these things, not anymore.

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

So it's like the high school social scene. Got it.

Define "caused a lot of trouble".

And why not? Did they cut off your subscription to Barge Weekly?

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

Wouldn't know.

The Master's done a bunch of things, including making the barge crash last week. Yeah, it can crash. Sorry to burst that bubble.

...Something like that.

I'm at least... assuming the boat looks fine now. If not, IGNORE THAT.

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

Home schooled?

Wait, so obviously there wasn't any major trauma as a result, I'm guessing - the boat looks fine now.

Uh huh. Your vagueness leaves so much to the imagination. I'm going to start filling in the situation mad-libs style for my only personal entertainment.

the boat is ~magic~ so that works.

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

Not really. I didn't really attend high school. Maybe periodically but- it doesn't matter.

The tin can was being fixed where were crashed, it's in better shape now.

Go for it.

sweet. <3

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

You didn't miss much. Female shark tank, basketball games with everyone wearing war paint, mayors turning into giant snakes...

Er, actually that last one probably wasn't all that common.

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

I didn't really care much about it, still don't. School wasn't really 'my scene.'

Giant snakes?

Are we talking cobra or king snake?

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

Actually I'm talking demonic snake. His name was something like Ovaltine. It was a long time ago.

notifs are crappy. ;-;

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

Ovaltine.

Demonic?

Yeah, sure, okay. You sound buckets of crazy, but mostly because no one else is on that kind of level besides me and Sam.

that they are ;__;

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

Something like that, I said.

And I am not crazy. [That hits a... really touchy spot, Dean.] ... And waitaminute, what do you mean 'on that kind of level'? So you fight demons too, but I'm buckets of crazy?

Did you think you were some kind of special snowflake? Because uh, legacy of women, Chosen at birth for hundreds of years, here.

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

When did I say I was a special snowflake? I'd rather not have the experience I do with demons and everything else I've hunted.

Rule one?

Don't jump to conclusions around here, it'll get you killed.

No, that wasn't a threat.

And don't turn this into a pissing contest. I'm really not trying to push you off of your podium.

It was sarcasm. People still look at me like I'm bat shit when I bring that stuff up... and some of the demons from where I'm from are here.

The ship is bigot central.

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

"No one else is on that level except me and Sam"? I don't know what they call it where you come from, but I think that's pretty universally ego-trippy.

And it's not a podium. I just don't appreciate people who actually apparently deal with demons calling me any quantity of crazy, whether bucketloads or otherwise.



But anyways, good to know that blabbing about demon snakes won't be well accepted by everybody, but that's pretty much a universal too.

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

For someone who wanted MY pointers you sure are selective about what you wanna hear.

THANKS FOR THE VGIFT BB <3

[cuzitswrong.livejournal.com]

[She is just... face palming all over right now.]

Ok, maybe we did that whole wrong foot thing here.

How about this. I'm Buffy.

-salute- no problemo!

[possemagnet.livejournal.com]

Dean.

Y'know the ship's not really so bad after you get adjusted. It's just the adjusting part that takes a shit ton of work.